The Copenhagen Summit was hailed as the greatest agreement upon which nations the world over could not agree.  President Obama led the charge, offering billions of dollars to resolve the man-made global warming crisis.  In light of our plummeting economy, one must wonder from which well these billions will spring.  In 2010, recipients of Social Security will not get a cost of living increase, a situation that may extend into 2011, 2012, and beyond.  Does that begin to give you a clue as to this mysterious well?

In addition to the President’s munificent offer, Americans continue to suffer for their generous hearts; we are asked to empower third world nations with our charity, A.K.A. our rapidly dwindling funds.   The charitable endeavors include digging water wells for Africans, installing porta-potties for Afghans, and presenting “little blue pills” to Bolivians.

There is an old saying, “Charity begins at home.”  With thousands of senior citizens saddled with medical, utility, cable, phone, and food bills, President Obama could issue an Executive order, allowing the elderly to enjoy their golden years.  Not drilling those wells, installing those porta-potties, facilitating the horizontal mambo of those in the continent below ours, or single-handedly saving the planet can accomplish this.

The answer to solving the problems of senior problems can be found in Gitmo.  It can be reopened.  Instead of hosting purported and admitted terrorists (“detainees”), the facility can be reopened to house the elderly.  Given all the privileges of the former occupants, the aged will have no bills, no worries, and all the comforts of home in a tropical paradise.  I can see myself now, sipping a Cuban Libra and watching the sun set on Guantanamo Bay, the soft sounds of Spanish guitars being strummed by field laborers after a hard day’s work.  My little town in New Jersey was never like this, with no cold winters and no bills, just balmy breezes and warm tropical days and nights. It’s great for aching bones and arthritis!

While the spirit of Christmas is still upon us, what better gift can be given the American seniors, who made this greatest nation on the earth, than the ability to enjoy the twilight of their years in peace and harmony?  “Peace on earth and good will towards men [and women]” — indeed!