What follows is purported to have been a London Times obituary. It has been circulated on the Internet, and its actual source and authorship are, to my knowledge, unknown. Nonetheless, I believe that, in its humorous way, it serves as a commentary on modern-day human behavior. The text of the “obituary,” edited for purposes of this publication, is as follows:
Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, “Common Sense,” who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
- knowing when to come in out of the rain;
- the early bird gets the worm;
- life isn’t always fair; and
- maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don’t spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student, but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses and criminals received better treatment than their victims.
Common Sense took a beating when you couldn’t defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.
Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.
Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, “Truth” and “Trust,” by his wife, “Discretion,” by his daughter, “Responsibility,” and by his son, “Reason.”
He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers – “I Know My Rights,” “I Want It Now,” “Someone Else Is To Blame,” and “I’m A Victim.”
Not many attended his funeral, because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.
I found this obit to be so touching. I believe with my whole heart we can thank organizations like ACLU for this condition. Why is it
they are there always for the groups that are trying to take away all our freedoms and morals.
I know many people who aren’t Christians, but have morals, but with
so many of our rights being removed, it even affect them.
Just thankful those of us who are believers in Jesus Christ as our savior, will get to spend our forever in a place where Common Sense is now living happily.
Thank you for allowing me to write this. Of course will be interesting if it gets to be shared with all who visit this website.
Another small town girl, Linda
This was an email that someone sent to me and just thought it was worth sharing since for as much education some people have they seem to let their common sense go down the toliet.The big issues that we should be concerned with seem to get thrown out the window and we keep dwelling on petty issues.Lets find soulutions instead of making more problems.
This is a good article that you found, small town girl. It points to the major indicators in a society going to the dogs.
What of the daily, small, and often unobserved lackings in critical thinking? I could write a book alone on this. The latest on my list was a conversation I’d had with a represenative of a vendor. At the end of the conversation, I asked to have the gist of the conversation put into writing for me. The young man asked, three times, what I meant. I finally asked him what HE thought I meant. In return, I received dead silence. To this and other youths like him, we leave our future?
Recently Susan Atkins of the Charles Manson Family was asking to be released because she is dying of cancer. Now she has spent I believe at least 40 years in prison and has spent the longest time incarcerated but she murdered many people. I don’t care if she clams to have been on LSD the fact remains she murdered people and a pregnant woman.
The state of California has been paying over $17.000 a month on her medical expenses. I just don’t get it. Why pay for someone like her when good people cant even afford health insurance and even food.
I just done get it.
Common sense is dead and buried. There’s not a medium or witchdoctor in the world that could raise it again.
While the politically correct are in power and the public are happy to sue anyone for their misfortunes for a quick buck it will never happen.
Big news in London at the moment: a schizo phrenic man has been allowed to train for the job of a cab driver. Not so bad you may think but he killed his wife some years ago and has recently been convicted of assault. If he doesn’t take his medication he’s likely to rip your throat out.
To every problem, there is a solution that is simple, inexpensive, and wrong.
Alas, alas, alas! This is all true.
No burglar has ever sued someone for being assaulted while breaking and entering and won.
Coffee should not be so hot that it gives a person third degree burns which require extensive skin grafts within seconds.
Yes, yes, it’s all just a gag, I know. However, retarded diatribes like this are why people still believe some of this nonsense. It looks like Believing Everything You Hear is still in good health.
Hee hee! Looks like Janus abandoned Common Sense long before its death.
It’ll come back after we learn our lesson.
Someday.
Janus, you took the words out of my mouth on both of those points.
The burglar suing for assault (and the one who supposedly sued for being locked in a family’s garage for that matter) is a myth. Check snopes.
And the coffee lawsuit was well-deserved. If it gave her third degree burns on her lap, what do you expect would have happened if she tried to drink it? The issue wasn’t about putting a warning label on the cup as much as it was NOT MAKING IT SO FREAKING HOT.
However, I do agree with the rest of this post. Common sense is dead (here in America at least).
A couple of years ago, a friend of mine in high school was reported by another student because he had a BB gun in the trunk of his car, in the parking lot. There was no ammunition in the car, the gun was not loaded, and it never left the trunk. He was expelled.
This is the result of people putting too much trust in the system and not enough in their intuition.
School Board: “This student has a non-lethal weapon that is in his car and unloaded. He has no apparent intention or motive to harm anyone. How should we respond? Well, let’s consult the rulebook.”
Rulebook: “Weapon on campus = Expelled”
School Board: “Sounds like an open-and-shut case.”
@janus: 1) While not exactly of the exact same vein, there are plenty of cases like this; someone sneaks in to a club through a window, breaks their foot, they win the case. Burglar gets trapped in house, sues the family, wins. It would be very difficult to find the exact citings amongst the urban legends abound across the internet, but there are a fair number of cases of such legal foolishness.
2) Now a pot-calling-kettle-black case, I’m fairly certain the highest reported was actually 2nd degree. Still pretty severe, but not to the same extent. You would figure if it was burning that badly, how in the hell was anybody drinking it?
I mean, after all, look what happened to “Nothing to Worry About”. His death could’ve been prevented
I do agree that common sense is dead…but this post also demonstrates that critical thinking and research have also been left far behind. A couple of others above hit the obvious two (sorry Abiding, you are actually very wrong…yet another victim of lack of critical thought and research…suing and winning a case are not the same thing, and the person with the spilled coffee had to have skin grafts, so far more than 2nd degree burns…case was won because McDonalds was told on numerous occasions to fix the problem prior and they refused to provide significant support to the victim for the skin grafts – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liebeck_v._McDonald%27s_Restaurants).
Some regulations go too far (schools definitely go too far), but most regulations are necessity and came into being because of bad behavior of various companies / corporations. Do your research into history of a century ago to see why a number of regulations got created.
I do find it funny that near the end of the obit there is a mention that “truth” has already died…the obit itself is largely evidence of that…
OK I don’t know how people make coffee in moron land, but in the rest of the world boiling water is involved. When your coffee is fresh it was recently boiling. That is why people tend to let their coffee cool before drinking it. You can argue that when you order a coffee from somewhere it is rarely fresh. Still most of us would not test that by dumping it on our laps.
Also if you follow unbound’s link there, you will see this idiot sat in her car, placed the coffee cup between her knees and pulled the far side of the lid (that is made to keep the coffee from spilling) toward her to remove it. Now who in the hell has so little respect for their genitals that they would ever do anything like that with any hot liquid ?
I too miss this dear friend.
It sounds like most of your common sense is gone. The coffee suit is a non-argument. She deserved the settlement. Yes, water is boiling to brew coffee. But it should cool in the carafe to 110 degrees and remain that way until it is discarded some hours later. Mcdonalds had a ridiculous policy to prevent loss of a few pennies profit by keeping their coffee at unreal temperatures for days upon end.
Imagine please if this was your wife, daughter, self, etc. Please tell me common sense means to put yourself in the shoes of others. To imagine how they must have felt and still feel. If it doesn’t, then common sense died long before you fools tried to define it.
“On February 27, 1992, Stella Liebeck, a 79-year-old woman from Albuquerque, New Mexico, ordered a 49¢ cup of coffee from the drive-through window of a local McDonald’s restaurant. Liebeck was in the passenger’s seat of her Ford Probe, and her grandson Chris parked the car so that Liebeck could add cream and sugar to her coffee. She placed the coffee cup between her knees and pulled the far side of the lid toward her to remove it. In the process, she spilled the entire cup of coffee on her lap.[9] Liebeck was wearing cotton sweatpants; they absorbed the coffee and held it against her skin as she sat in the puddle of hot liquid for over 90 seconds, scalding her thighs, buttocks, and groin.[10] Liebeck was taken to the hospital, where it was determined that she had suffered third-degree burns on six percent of her skin and lesser burns over sixteen percent.[11] She remained in the hospital for eight days while she underwent skin grafting. During this period, Liebeck lost 20 pounds (nearly 20% of her body weight), reducing her down to 83 pounds.[12] Two years of medical treatment followed.”
Please, continue to cheapen this woman’s suffering. Jesus loves that sort of thing.
Lets see… “Liebeck was wearing cotton sweatpants; they absorbed the coffee and held it against her skin as she sat in the puddle of hot liquid for over 90 seconds”
90 seconds??
Ok so lets just pretend you’re that person, lets see what goes through your head when you spill coffee on yourself:
OW that hurts!!! coffee all over me, oh well, I guess I’ll just SIT here for 1 and a half minute until I get 2nd degree burns!!!
OK, sounds good to me! I mean, it’s not like I could just take the pants off and get off the seat, noo… I’d rather get the burns, yup.
Are you a professional journalist? You write very well.
I like the first comment on this site. Quote:
“Just thankful those of us who are believers in Jesus Christ as our savior, will get to spend our forever in a place where Common Sense is now living happily.”
Is this some new form of sarcasm? Or is this person actually claiming to be a Christian AND have common sense. Sorry girlfriend, it’s one or the other, you can’t believe that when you die you will go to a magical land in the clouds with everyone you ever loved to live happily ever after and claim to understand what the arthur was going for in this article. You are the person we’re making fun of here, the fact that you think it’s funny proves your a retard. Linda is it? I hope you read this and take stock of your wasted life.
I think it’s ridiculous how people are arguing over the small details that aren’t really important at all.
The point is: don’t be stupid.
We can all agree that Common Sense is dead (or dying), right? What’s the point in arguing further? Talk about taking things too seriously…
And, I don’t think it’s important whether the burglars won the lawsuits or not. I think it’s more of the fact that they actually /filed/ one, considering that they were the ones that broke into the house in the first place… Well, they certainly lacked common sense.
I read this and the comments that followed. I’m just… awed.
Everyone just doesn’t GET IT. So the truth may be obscured. Is the point? No. People are too used to being spoon-fed everything they want from the government, never taking a step back and thinking about how what they’re going to do will affect the other people around them and the morals of the world, instead of just him or her self. I’m trying to write out the thoughts swarming in my mind but it’s difficult to sort them out.
True, everyone who blindly follows this is misled. But the person who reads this and instantly denounces it, saying that this person has their facts wrong and blah blah blah, isn’t reading for the point. Make your own inferences. Use your own brain. Does what the author says have logic? Do the events and experiences in your own life agree with the point?
I find it very interesting. I just wish more people actually knew and read this. We need to start an awareness revolution! Or just bring back manners. Whatever comes first.
Mercy Mercy Me says:
August 7, 2009 at 11:18 am
t points to the major indicators in a society going to the dogs.
Hasn’t it always?
First of all let me say one thing. Unbound, wikipedia is not a valid source. You cannot get away with using wikipedia as a source in school and if you can then you’re not going to a very good school.
Second thing, so what if some of these facts are wrong. Common sence is still dead. Look at the family that got the media hyped up making everyone think their kid was floating in a balloon. What sane person gives their kid a balloon that is bigger than them and filled with something that will can carry them into the air? Not a very good one.
America has killed Common Sense and the only way we can fix it is if we stop being so ignorant. Seriously, I, a high school student, am smarter than many adults because of the simple fact that I can decide for myself what I need in this world. I would not sue someone for my simple accident of spilling coffee I just bought onto myself. Coffee=hot.
I would not be stupid enough to break into someone’s house and then get trapped inside. Also, if they beat me with a baseball bat then I would not be angry with them because I would know what I was doing is wrong.
People these days…
we all need to change.
Now start arguing and find some remnants of Common Sense before he dissappears completly.
“Please tell me common sense means to put yourself in the shoes of others.” No Olive, that’s called empathy. An example of common sense would be to understand the coffee from a drive through window is hot, so you can wait until you get where you are going before adding cream or sugar. You know, so you don’t burn yourself in the car. People talk about this like the coffee was some kind of public health risk, as if it clear that people would be hurt by Mcdonald’s reckless coffee preparation. Yet they were making coffee the same way for fifty years in a country as big as ours and only one person got burned. You could say this woman was not the first person to be burned by the coffee this badly just the first to sue, but that means anyone else this happened to knew it was stupid to dump coffee in their lap and they left it alone. On a final note, “Please, continue to cheapen this woman’s suffering. Jesus loves that sort of thing.” Common sense also means you don’t let the fear of invisible men control your actions.
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I agree with the overall gist of this article, and must point out that the woman who wrote it was, in effect, simply quoting another piece published in England. Therefore, it makes no sense to attack her.
Our society has, by and large, lost its integrity to take responsibility for itself. Not lost the ability, but the INTEGRITY to do so. One case in point: people who sue fast food restaurants for the high cholestorol levels and excess body fat that they’ve incurred from years of eating that food!
On the topic of food fast, and regarding the coffee/McDonald’s incident, it was regrettable for the woman who was scalded, but looking at the facts, one must ask additional questions:
1. Her nephew was the first to handle the coffee. If it was so hot, why didn’t he caution his aunt to allow it cool down properly before adding cream and sugar?
2. Isn’t it possible that the hands of the 79 year old shook as she opened the container — the wrong way?
3. If they were going to simply sit in the parking lot and drink the coffee in the car, why didn’t they enter the restaurant? If the beverage had spilled in there, it may have spilled on the table instead of the woman. Or, if had spilled on her, she could have run to the ladies’ room, ripped off the sweats, and doused herself with cold water — actions that would have alleviated some of the burning.
Common sense is not yet completely dead and buried, but it’s surely making plans for it’s own funeral.
WTF?
“We can thank organizations like ACLU for this condition. Why is it they are there always for the groups that are trying to take away all our freedoms and morals.”
LINDA GANDY (& anyone else who believes her crap): You dopes! The American Civil Liberties Union does one thing: Defend the civil rights, of all Americans. “Because Freedom can’t defend itself.”
They’re about the US Bill of Rights. You’re against that? Wake up! Get yourself a big steaming cup of Common Sense!
I’ve seen this smarmy little diatribe in about 5 chain letter forwards from people, and the reasons common sense is dead are always different, depending on the bullshit righteous indignation of the person who started/forwarded it. Prayer in schools, rap music, court cases… whatever the latest scapegoat for “All of America’s Problems” is! If common sense is dead, maybe people should go about reviving it. I don’t see this chain letter doing anything but making people smug and self-satisfied. Get out there and start getting schools to teach kids to think for themselves, learn how to cope with the real world, and how to be skeptical, instead of teaching them abstract concepts and preparing them for life in a desk job and expect life to be like school curriculum. Start getting parents to do the same. Call people on their shit, and most of all, WORK ON YOUR OWN PREJUDICES AND JUDGEMENTS.
Admit your own damn messes and mistakes before you point out anyone else’s.
Common sense isn’t dead. The article focuses on a very small percentage of the population featured in news and media, there are much, much more people who still live with so-called “common sense,” but these individuals aren’t as interesting to hear about.
As evidenced by the number of people moved by the article, majority of humanity knows right from wrong and understands the misdeeds documented in this “obituary.” If common sense was truly dead, who would be moved by such an article, or post their thanks to the online submission?
I think another part of common sense, is realizing that people, for the most part, mean well and desire fair justice.
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You made some Good points there. I did a search on the topic and found most people will agree.
You call this common sense? So-called “discipline” is bullshit.
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Great reading. Thank you. But as long as religion has any say in the way we run our lives then the hope for “common sense resurection” is Zilch!
Our trust and faith in our “beters and “the priest” has been shattered time and time again.
All common sense demands id that we treat others as we wish to be treated. Oh and perhaps a smile and some tolerance, consideration and getting rid of the avarice so prevelant in places such as The Federal reserve, RSB and importantly the cult that runs them.
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I do agree with all of what is said in this blog for the most part, however I do like the post that common sense is not dead, but simply challenged. Urban legends or not, the fact remains that common sense has been abandoned by people especially in media and presumed dead in our society. Things like the girls suing and winning a lawsuit against McDonalds claiming that they did not know that eating their food EVERY meal would make them fat. How about the obesity epidemic in America and yet schools are sponsored by Coca-Cola to carry their soft drinks in every hallway. Granted I’m no expert but I do think I know a base knowledge of what should be common sense. It seems society could be regressing back to the days when we actually didn’t know any better. Bring back discipline and allow for curiosity, stop being so politically correct and over protective. Love the article keep up the good work.
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